September 16 is the start of the Jewish High Holy Days, Rosh
Hashanah and Yom Kippur. It’s the start of the Jewish New Year. Part of the preparation
is to ask for forgiveness from anyone you may have wronged during the previous
year. To whatever extent possible, we want to begin the year with a clean slate
– and without anyone harboring a grudge against us. One should also be quick to
forgive those who have wronged them. Judaism has common sense principals. Why
not forgive those who have wronged us? Why not begin every year with a clean
slate? However, I have been recalling something that was a long time ago (very
long) to someone who I mistreated. Her name was Margaret.
I was in the fourth grade. (I said it was very long!) Margaret lived on the other street around the
corner from my house and went to the Catholic School. I didn’t know her
personally—only through my other friends. She was overweight, and kinda nerdy,
not as “hip” as we were, and definitely not as cool. They called her Maggie Moo
Head. So we cruelly taunted and teased her as kids can do. I chimed along. “Maggie
Moo Head” we would shout when she appeared outside. And we would laugh—at her
expense. She stuck out her tongue at us, and that was even funnier. But her
feelings had to be hurt. Today it would be classified as bullying. And I knew
what it felt like to be the other end of teasing youngsters. Berger was my
maiden name which was continually transformed into “cheeseburger” and even
worse. It didn’t feel good. But that didn’t stop me as a tormentor. Part of the
growing up process, I suppose. To be part of a gang and especially as an only
child, friends and acceptance were important to me. Even at the expense of
Margaret.
So, here we are now adults. I moved away from Peoria and
that neighborhood long ago. I don’t know what happened to those kids way back
then. I don’t know what happened to Margaret. I hope she was able to get past
the teasing and move on, too. I hope she found love and acceptance. I wish I could
apologize for those days of yelling Maggie
Moo Head. This happened many years ago yet I am still regretful. I can’t
take it back, but I can reflect and learn. I grew up and got to know what it
really means to be hurt by others—even those who you love the most—it’s not
fun.
Judaism teaches “Be loving to your neighbor as you would
yourself.” “Do unto others…” is the Golden Rule. One doesn’t need to practice a
religion or even believe in anything to practice being kind. Why wait until the
end of a year to ask forgiveness or to forgive? Why wait until we have a slate
that needs to be cleaned? If we live by the Golden Rule daily, then it’s just
common sense.
